In the same way humans would make amusing pets for a superior, alien species, perhaps only requiring a device like a control collar to curtail our more destructive and unsavoury behaviours, so with a little accessorization, the addition of pants, chickens too, can make great pets.

As we all know from the internet, animals from rats to platypodes (that’s the correct plural of platypuses, not platypi) love to indulge in a tickle from their human friends, while llamas, lemurs, hogs and wombats enjoy a play and a cuddle.

In the backyard, many domesticated animals, formerly considered merely as food producers or food products are often now considered pets. They have their own personalities, and creatures from pigs to goats are often seen indoors, not in a spicy BBQ sauce, but as members of the family.

Chickens are especially endearing, friendly, loved by children, and if they have grown up with people, enjoy a cuddle.

Unfortunately toilet training chickens is an as yet uncertain science. However, the invention of poultry pampers means your favourite chicken can now sit in your lap and strut around the house without leaving an unpleasant mess.

Chicken diapers are also quite stylish, and a chicken wearing the latest design seems to take an unaccountable enjoyment from strutting its stuff. Rather like a model on a catwalk, they pose, preen and strut and peacock. Here’s some pictures. Cock-o-the-Walk indeed.

mypetchickencoat

Wearing a lovely apron.

mypetchickentie

Quite dapper but not crowing about it in a delightful bow tie.

roostercollar

Chicken feed, in even the most improbable cases, manages to convey the aspect of intelligence.

USAUSAPOOP

Duck Diapers! USA! USA!

Yes, they make great pets. And there’s a whole range of avian accessories available for your household poultry, including duck diapers, poultry pampers, aprons, coats, pullovers, bow ties that prevent crowing, harnesses and leashes in case you enjoy a chicken or duck walk, and perhaps a diamond collar for the rooster who has everything.

A good place to start for information on the joys and practicalities of farm birds as domestic pets is mypetchicken.com

About The Author

C S Hughes

C S Hughes is a proud member of the TV generation, studied film and communications, collects the paperback books of Philip K Dick, loves science fiction and fantasy books, B grade movies and cult TV, American thrillers and British noir, restoring vintage watches, reading poetry, creating innovative illustrated poetry books which are available in Apple’s iBooks format, and cake. Especially cake. He has also written short stories, and has a collection of horror stories coming out in 2015.

3 Responses

  1. Underdogge

    If this had been published on April 1st rather than May 1st no prizes for guessing what I would have been thinking. Some of the chickens in the photos indeed have “posh pants” and I guess this feature acts as a counterbalance to the “Animals without Pants” from last year.

    Reply
    • Olga Hughes

      Ah, good memory Underdogge. These chooks are gorgeous – the apron is my favourite.

      Reply
  2. C S Hughes
    C S Hughes

    Animals really need to decide whether they want pants or not!

    Reply

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.